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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27709232">Paperwork</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_writin/pseuds/just_writin'>just_writin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Law &amp; Order: SVU</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 07:09:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,024</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27709232</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_writin/pseuds/just_writin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Olivia asks Rafael about some paperwork that he drew up for a case.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rafael Barba &amp; Olivia Benson, Rafael Barba/Olivia Benson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>46</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Paperwork</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Watching SVU reruns during quarantine inspired some short writing pieces and I thought I would share. I, obviously, own nothing!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Barba was standing beside his desk looking at court paperwork when she walked into his office. He looked up and gave her a small smile in greeting. </p><p>“Lieutenant how was the hearing?” he asked. Olivia had moved to stand behind the guest chairs in front of his desk. </p><p>“Carmen stopped by…she dropped off a petition for termination of parental rights.” Barba’s smile dropped when he heard her tone and realized why she was here. Slightly panicked but desperately trying not to be, he looked her right in the eye with his best attempt of nonchalance. </p><p>Olivia continued, “I told you about the hearing this morning, you wouldn’t have had time to draw up the paperwork since then.” She raised her eyebrows, challenging him to deny it.  Rafael looked away, making a show of shuffling through the documents still in his hand. “I didn’t. It was from another case.” </p><p>“What case?” Olivia countered, drawing closer to his desk.</p><p> “A previous case.” </p><p>Throwing the papers in a random drawer to deal with another time, Barba perched on the edge of his desk, facing Olivia. He slowly drew his eyes back to her, taking in her appearance. She was wearing low heeled boots, putting her just slightly taller than him even if he had remained standing. She wore dark-wash jeans and a muted green blouse covered by a light black jacket, just slightly damp from the misting rain that had been falling all day. He finally reached her face.</p><p>
  <em>God, she is beautiful.</em>
</p><p>A mantra synonymous with Liv if he had ever heard of one. Objectively, she was attractive. But the more Rafael got to work and got to really know Olivia, he discovered that she was truly beautiful. Her kindness, her compassion, her dedication, and her joy and love of life that had endured through the grime and darkness of working sex crimes. These were all things that to Rafael, made Olivia truly beautiful. And being a mother amplified everything tenfold. He knew as soon as she had told him about her foster son that he was sunk. He hadn’t even met the kid yet and he knew that Noah was going to change everything in her life for the better. It was one of the reasons he justified not telling her. Not telling her about how sorry he was about Lewis. Not telling her how he felt. Not telling her how seeing her smile was the highlight of his day. And especially not telling her about the papers.</p><p>He never told her for a reason, he never wanted to reveal the truth: he was in love with Olivia Benson. Now, it could all be blown to hell. He finally looked into her eyes: determination, slight confusion, and the tiniest glint that let him know she wasn’t backing down without a fight. </p><p>He released a breath. “Johnny D.” It was simple, as if it would explain everything. And in a way, it did. </p><p>Olivia’s determination turned into glare. She knew. Well, she at least suspected as much when Carmen showed up with the paperwork. Afterall, he really didn’t have time that morning to draw it up, so it had to have come from somewhere. Johnny D’s case, and Noah, had immediately come to mind. But why hadn’t he told her? Knowing that he had that in his back pocket would have alleviated so much of her worry. They were supposed to be friends, and he chose to hide that from her when she could have used the reassurance. Such a betrayal of their partnership left her feeling hurt and angry. She had thought he was different…</p><p>“You never told me.” She stated, allowing some of her anger to seep through the statement. Rafael at least had the decency to look guilty. He removed his gaze from her once more, choosing to look out his office window, trying not to completely crumble under her stare. </p><p>“You were never supposed to find out.” He sounded exhausted but also relieved, as if the weight of keeping this secret had finally be released. And it was true, the petition was never supposed to be used because using it would have meant that he had lost the trial. Johnny D. would have been found not guilty. Barba would have lost. And Noah would have been in real danger. </p><p>Rafael chose to be confident in his cases leading up to and during trial. Even when evidence was lacking and witness were shaky, his confidence helped the jury have confidence in his prosecution. But that case…there was so much at stake if he lost. His personal connection to Liv, and through her Noah, made him even more concerned when preparing for trial. He revised notes every night before bed, drew countless answer trees, and considered several strategies on how to get the conviction. It also prompted him to do something he had never done for any other trial: he drew up a contingency plan. Rafael stood up and walked over to his office window.</p><p>“It was really late one night, I was prepping for the trial. I think we were about two days out.” He took a deep breath, and exhaled “I was so scared, Liv.” He shook his head slightly before continuing. “We needed the conviction…and our witnesses were…less than ideal. I couldn’t sleep. I could barely eat without thinking about what would happen to Noah if that monster got ahold of him. But there wasn’t anything else that I could do. We had the evidence and witness that we had, and I was absolutely terrified that he was going to get away with it…that he was going to take Noah from you.” He paused, trying to figure out how to best explain himself.  “I made a back up plan, so that even if I lost the case, you could still have a chance at keeping Noah, protecting Noah from his…” he trailed off, not able to bring himself to say ‘father’. Barba cleared his throat before continuing. “It was before <em>Tomilson v. Brown</em>. Without precedent, the petition didn’t hold much ground and even with the right judge it was still a long shot at being approved. I just didn’t want to get your hopes up.” He chanced a glance back at Olivia, trying to gauge her reaction. Her gaze had softened. The anger and accusatory stare had been replaced with pure compassion…and if he chose to believe it possible, love. </p><p>“You never told me.” She repeated herself, but it was soft and questioning. Rafael looked back out the window. </p><p>“I never meant to hide it from you. It…it was outside of my purview as a prosecutor to even draw up the paperwork. And I didn’t want any personal relationship…or friendship…between us possibly cause an issue with the trial. And then the shooting, and Nick leaving, and….” He was rambling now, trying to justify to her, to himself, that he had good reasons for never telling her. “…and then there was another case, and you were finishing the adoption process, and then…then it seemed too late.” He ended lamely before suddenly remembering Noah’s maternal grandmother.  “And legally the situation with Shelia was completely different because of the adoption and…” Rafael trailed off as he saw Liv came into view. </p><p>During his rambling, Olivia had moved from her position on the other side of his guest chairs to stand before him. She had suspected that the petition was Noah’s, or at least it was originally Noah’s, but hearing him confirm it made her heart skip a beat. Just as he ended his little speech, Olivia threw her arms around his neck. Rafael hesitated for a moment before returning the hug, still unsure how she really felt about his deception. </p><p>He heard a small sniffle, and then she whispered, “Thank you, Rafael.” They remained in their position for a few more moments, enjoying the contact.</p><p>“I carried a copy with me every day of the trial…just in case. The first day I was so nervous about jinxing the entire case that I forgot to match my socks to my suspenders.” Olivia laughed at that, pulling away slightly, but leaving her hands around his neck. His hands lowered and rested on her hips. </p><p>“I don’t think anyone noticed” she said with a slightly teary-eyed smile which Rafael returned. </p><p>“Good. I have a reputation to maintain.” His smile turned into a smirk, trying for some levity. Olivia of course, saw right through it. She scanned his face, registering every line on his face and the deep green of his eyes. Olivia moved her right hand, letting her thumb gently brush his cheek before letting it come to rest on the left side of his face. </p><p>“Really, Rafael, thank you for everything that you do for me and Noah.” Rafael tried to swallow, his throat suddenly dry from her movement.</p><p>“I will always have your back, Liv. That’s what best friends are for. That’s what family is for.” She still had that small smile on her face. Eyes slightly damp from emotion. Olivia leaned in and placed a kiss on his right cheek, lingering for a moment longer than platonically appropriate. She drew back and Rafael’s eyes widened. </p><p>“What you did was more than just being family.” She softly said. She withdrew from him and walked towards his office door. She stopped and turned back towards him.</p><p>“Ya know, tonight is spaghetti night. It would be nice to have more family there.” She extended the offer cautiously, not wanting to push him further than he was willing to go. Even after his admission she wasn’t sure how close of family he wanted to be. After all, being fun Uncle Rafa was different than the role she could see him fulfilling. The role she was hoping he would want to fulfill. She was paused in the doorway, waiting for his answered. Rafael, still slightly shocked from the kiss, just stared at her before clearing his throat. </p><p>“Six?” </p><p>Olivia nodded and bit her lip trying to contain her smile. </p><p>He gave her a soft smile, “See you then.” </p><p>Olivia nodded again and backed out the door. She made her way out of his office, down the hall and to the elevator. Once inside, safe from the prying eyes of others, Olivia let herself smile wide. She giggled lightly as she remembered the look of shock on his face when she kissed him. He was completely unguarded in the moment and she was able to fully read him. While Rafael and Olivia regularly confided in each other and sought comfort from each other, she still felt sometimes like he was hiding something from her. She had caught glimpses from him before. Usually it was when he didn’t think she was watching him, like over a drink or late at night going over case notes. She would see him looking at her in a way no one had ever looked at her before. But this afternoon, after she kissed his cheek, it was on full view for all the world to see: it had been love. It was that look that inspired Olivia to extend the invitation to Spaghetti night. She was excited that he had accepted her invitation and she knew that Noah would love to see his favorite Uncle. Rafael had eaten dinner with them before, usually takeout before going over cases. But spaghetti night was something that Olivia usually reserved for just her, Noah, and occasionally Lucy. Olivia couldn’t help but hope that tonight would be the start of a new chapter for all of them.</p><p>The elevator opened and a courier entered with a vase of flowers. The exchanged polite nods and the messenger took his place on the other side of the elevator. As the doors closed again, Olivia couldn’t help but think that she should pick Carmen up something the next time she came to Rafael’s office. After all, if she hadn’t gotten to the hearing just in time who knows how long it would have taken for Rafael to reveal his little secret.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The court case is made up and I know nothing about law...so please just pretend that it makes sense.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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